I
found this book to be an excellent next step after his work “How to Read a
Book”, about which I did a paper a few years ago. This book builds on the earlier work and expands many of the
author’s concepts about reading to speaking and listening. Speaking and listening can occur between two
people or you and groups of all sizes.
The art of listening is taken for granted in our society but so much of
what we learn about and what we want our patients to learn about comes via the
auditory channel.
This
book includes many guidelines for improving your abilities in both the areas of
listening and speaking. The following
are some of the quotes that I felt were particularly significant:
In
the section on the “sales talk” he describes three parts to persuasion – ethos, pathos, and logos. In the first stage, ethos, you establish your credibility as
a speaker. “You can do it by telling
stories about yourself, the effectiveness of which will be heightened if they
provoke laughter and the laughter is about you. You can do it more indirectly by underestimating your credentials
to speak about the matter at hand, thus allowing the listeners to dismiss your
underestimation as undue modesty. You
can also do it by suggesting your association with others whom you praise for
certain qualities that you hope your listeners will also attribute to
you.” This is part of what I have
called “establishing the legend of who you are”. This needs to be done in every situation where you are attempting
to persuade another.
In
the second step, pathos, you, “arouse
the passions of the listeners, getting their emotions running in the direction
of the action to be taken. Pathos is the motivating factor.” To be effective in the use of pathos you, “must recognize those human
desires that they can depend upon as being present and actively motivating
forces in almost all human beings – the desire for liberty, for justice, for
peace, for pleasure, for worldly goods, for honor, good repute, position, or
preference.” “Persuaders cannot always
count on desires that are generally prevalent in their audiences and ready to
be brought into play. Sometimes people
have needs or wants that are dormant, needs or wants of which they are not
fully aware. These, persuaders must try
to awaken and vitalize.”
In
the margin I wrote, “Do you want your child to be better?” I can recall in particular two instances
over the years where the answer to this question was not evident to me. Having a child with a problem was what was
defining these particular parents or families.
It was a rallying point. The
families were being held together by this issue and without it what would these
families become? I cannot recall now if
I ever asked the question aloud directly but reading this section of the book
definitely reminded me of these two cases.
Logos – the marshalling of
reasons – comes last. “Reasons and
arguments may be used to reinforce the drive of the passions, but reasons and
arguments will have no force at all unless your listeners are already disposed
emotionally to move in the direction that your reason and arguments try to
justify.”
In
the section on “Uninterrupted Speech” Adler states, “A good lecturer, in short,
must have some of the gifts of a good actor.
Each time the curtain goes up, no matter how many times it has gone up
before for the lecturer, it should always seem like a new performance for the
audience. Their sense of novelty should
be heightened by the sense that the speaker is discovering for the first time
the truths he is expounding. The skill
of the lecturer in dramatizing the moments of discovery will draw listeners
into the activity of discovering the truths to be learned.” When I read this, I felt Adler was talking
directly to me. It may be my music
background but I certainly see that each time I get up in front of a group, I
love the feelings of telling a story and unraveling for them, as if it were the
first time, just how I came to see the shred of knowledge about which I am
speaking.
Adler
continues, “The speaker should be able to make a fairly shrewd guess concerning
the general character of the views about the subject chosen that are likely to
be prevalent among the listeners. To persuade listeners to change their minds
by adopting views contrary to ones they have persistently and, perhaps,
obstinately held, it is necessary to undermine their prejudices in a manner
that is as firm as it is gentle.
Long-standing prejudices are barriers to persuasion. They must be removed before positive
persuasion can begin. Removing them
opens the mind and renders it receptive to views of a contrary tenor.” This is so essential in the case
presentation. Find out where your
audience is. What are their mental
models? What do they think can and
should be done? This tells you where
you need to begin, by undermining these preconceived beliefs. Therefore, no two case presentations can
ever be exactly the same.
Later
on Adler states, “Always risk talking over their heads! By the emotional fervor
of your speech, by its physical energy and your manifest bodily involvement
with materials that are obviously abstract, you should be able to get them to
stretch their minds and reach up for insights they did not have before.”
In
a section entitled “With the Mind’s Ear” he states, “Listening is primarily an
activity of the mind, not of the ear or the eye. When the mind is not actively involved in the process, it should
be called hearing, not listening; seeing, not reading.”
There
is much more in this work about how to listen, how to take notes, and how to
communicate in other varied situations.
I highly recommend this book.